I was driving around town this afternoon when it hit me.
Tomorrow is Mother's Day.
I mean I knew that.
I have been thinking about it in regards to my own momma.
But as I was driving around town the thought that hit me was that tomorrow is Mother's Day and I'm okay. I'm not in a puddle of tears.
Three hours, a pregnancy announcement on social media, and someone posting about losing their baby later..
I'm not as okay.
But I still smile because I am a momma to Jayden.
I remember every second of those twelve weeks so vividly it's unlike any other memories I have.
And I smile.
Do I question if I will ever be pregnant again?
Yes.
Do I have misplaced anger over my circumstances that do not appear to be changing?
Yes.
Do I still constantly daydream about another pregnancy and all the joy that comes with that?
Yes.
Is my God still good?
Yes!
Is my God still faithful?
Yes!
So I still smile and move forward.
I feel you and hear you. My first loss was so hard on me. My second loss came after I had two kids, but was also hard. I also have experienced the loss of having a severely autistic child and how much of a struggle that is. Mother's Day mean so many different things to everyone. I love your openness and honesty. Have a good day friend.
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