Pride

This time last year Andrew and I were living in two different towns.  He was finding his way at his new job and I was finishing up the school year at my current job.  

Funny how that seems like forever ago.

During our six months of living in separate places there was one week that I remember being particularly hard for me.  I was missing my husband and was tired of living alone in a stinky apartment.   I sent a group text out to family pretty much whining about how hard it was to live in separate towns and asking for their prayers.

My brother-in-law, Cary, was sweet enough to remind me that there was a reason I hadn't moved when Andrew did.  God still had a purpose for me at HG and in central Arkansas.  He wasn't finished with me there yet.

That reminder helped me not only survive that hard week but it helped me with the rest of my time there alone in that stinky apartment.   I had a purpose there that was about more than just fulfilling my contract with HG.

All of this came flooding back to me yesterday morning as I was laying in bed.  It was a still moment in the morning when I was caught half way between sleep and consciousness.  The house was still quiet and I was alone with my thoughts.

As I remembered the words that Cary shared with me almost a year ago I realized how true they still are for me today.

Sometimes I get so caught up in dreaming about the future and imagining our lives with a baby that I forget God has a purpose for me right now.

Before children.

He isn't waiting on me to become a mom to use me.  He has a plan for me right now.

My purpose in life is not to become a mom but to bring glory to Christ.  Yes I believe he will use our story of waiting for his glory, but I also believe that He desires to use other parts of my life right now to bring him glory.

I've allowed Satan in and I've shifted my focus away from God and onto my own selfish and prideful desires.

It's a sickening feeling. 

I am so thankful that God loves me and forgives me.  I'm thankful that He can help me become more aware of pride as it tries to sneak into my heart.

When I have pride in my life it gets in the way of my having an intimate relationship with Christ.  

Lord, cleanse me of my pride and protect me from letting pride into my heart.  Help me to be more aware of this sin in my life.  Humble me Lord for I desire intimacy with you.

In Jesus' Name,  Amen  

The Beginning of Our Journey into Adult Braces

I'm married to a researcher.  

It's one of the many things that I love about my husband.  He doesn't make a single decision without first researching the topic at hand for not just hours on end but days on end.  Sometimes weeks or months on end.

I am not a researcher.  And the way I see it there is no need to become one since I'm married to one.  

Who needs google when you have Andrew?

A few months ago when we started visiting orthodontist and trying to decide how to proceed with braces, I ended up seeing three different orthodontist with three different opinions.  Though it felt like I had visited four orthodontist since Andrew had his own opinion based on all the research he had been doing.

Is it crazy that I trusted my husband more than the guys with degrees who have been doing this for many many years?

He had spent hours looking at before and after pictures, watching videos, and reading case studies.  I knew he wasn't taking the decision lightly.

I researched too.  By that I obviously mean that I read blogs where people journaled their journey through adult braces.

Very scientific!

In case there is someone else out there who researches the way I do and for our own memory I'm going to blog our journey through adult braces.

The good, the bad, and the ugly.

My journey begins in two short weeks.

On March 6 I will have four teeth pulled.  Yikes!  I'm having the fourth tooth from the front on top and bottom on both sides pulled.

I'm really not nervous about it like I thought I would be.  My dentist is that good.  Plus they are going to give me a happy pill to take before hand to help with my anxiety.  I'm more nervous about the after.  I'm going to have four big holes in my mouth where teeth should go.  How am I supposed to eat like that?

Once those four teeth are removed it is time for a string of appointments with my orthodontist, Dr. Lay.  The first appointment is scheduled for the following week on March 13.  At this appointment I believe they will be putting in spacers - which from what I can tell are like little rubber bands that will sit around my tooth - and my top brackets.

On March 17 I go back so that Dr. Lay can put the bands on the top brackets and start moving those top teeth.

I go back again the week after on March 28 to get my bottom brackets and bands.  

Then I should be good to go for a little while.  All decked out in my braces.

My students are so excited about this.  Several of them are currently going through braces and they think it is so cool that I'm getting them too.  They all have suggestions as to what colors I should get.  They want me to get neon, glow in the dark, or zebra.  All a little wild when you are 30.

Andrew will begin the process in April.  He will have one single tooth pulled on April 23.  Then he will he will get spacers and the first of his brackets on April 30.  He will have one less appointment than I do because he isn't getting bottom braces.

My students also think it would be so funny if Mr. Weaver and I got stuck together when we kiss goodnight.  LOL!  Love that they think the only time we kiss is to say goodnight.  :)

Truth be told I'm kind of excited about getting braces.  It's not only going to help with the cosmetics of my teeth but the health of my teeth.  I'm a grinder at night.  I always have been.  I don't do it as often now, but I still do it.  It seems I do it because of the placement of my teeth.  Hopefully braces and then sleeping in a retainer will help me to stop doing this.

     

A Letter in Waiting

Several weeks ago I wrote about how everyone waits in their own way.  There is no right way to wait.  I have found that's even true within my own marriage.  Andrew and I wait differently even while we wait together for the same thing.  We are not wired the same way.

Though some days it drives me crazy when he doesn't get as worked up about something as I do, most of the time I'm thankful for his logical, man way of thinking.

 It keeps me sane.

 It keeps me from becoming overly stressed.

 He is my constant reminder that God is the one in control.  Not us.

We both want a baby.  But we show that and we feel that in two very different ways.  It doesn't mean that one of us wants a baby more than the other.  It just means we are two different people.

We wait differently.

Something that helps me in my waiting that I'm not sure my husband completely understands is spending hours online looking at all things baby: nurseries, clothes, photo op ideas, etc.

Our children have a full library already.  Andrew doesn't "get" why I have boxes of books for a child I don't yet have in a closet.

It's not how he waits.

The other day as I was thinking about our time of waiting I felt led to write my someday baby a letter.  I want to write my children letters about special occasions and dreams and thoughts throughout their life.  Then when they turn 18 or when they get married or when they have their first child, I can give them this box of letters - this box of love.

So I'm stepping out on this scary limb and posting my first letter here on the blog for the entire world to see.  To be honest, I'm not sure why I'm sharing it.  I just feel like I'm supposed to.  My prayer is that maybe, just maybe, God will use this letter in ways I can't even imagine.





To my beautiful first born,

    I am sitting here tonight wondering about you.  I wonder if you will look more like me or your Daddy. 

   I wonder if you will be a star basketball player like Daddy or a bookworm like me.

  I wonder if you will tell stories with the same enthusiasm that your Daddy does. 

  I wonder if you will love school the same way I always have.

  I wonder what your favorite food will be and what your first word will be. 

  I wonder what you will be when you grow up. 

  I wonder how your Daddy and I will feel the first time we hear your little heartbeat or the first time we look into your eyes.  

I wonder what will make you laugh and what will make you cry.

There are so many things that I wonder about.  I could never list them all.  I cannot wait until I get to meet you and hold you in my arms for the first time.  I cannot wait to watch you learn and grow as I discover all the answers to my "I wonders".

I love you sweet baby with my whole heart.

Mommy.

 

Our Valentine's Day 2014

Andrew worked in the Little Rock office yesterday and since I was out of school I decided to go with him.  The idea was that we could go out to eat some place nice when he got off work.

After I dropped him off at work I met up with my BFF and former boss for breakfast.  It was so nice to just sit and talk with them.  We did that every day when I worked at HG and it is probably the thing I miss most about working there.  We sat there visiting until the lunch crowd starting showing up.  

After breakfast I piddled around going in different little boutiques and stores.  I was hoping to find something new to wear to dinner but I wasn't really in the mood to buy anything.  I found several cute tops but ended up putting them all back and not buying anything. 

I was able to roam around Target for awhile.  Oh how I miss Target.  

Our little trip to LR also allowed me to get my haircut my regular stylist.  Thank goodness Ellie could fit me in.  I've decided that instead of trying to find a stylist here, I'm just going to have Andrew schedule his LR office days around my hair visits.  HA!

After getting more opinions than I ever expected and a lot of debate on my part I made my decision about which haircut I wanted.

Call me old and boring but I went back to this haircut.  

It's what I'm most comfortable with and I feel like it makes me look a little closer to my age.  

After my haircut it was time for dinner.  I picked up Andrew at 5:00 and we headed to Outback.  We really thought we would beat the crowd.  

We were wrong.  

They told us it was going to be an hour and a half wait.  We decided that in that time we could already be home.  We'll just have to use the Outback gift card another time.

So we drove home and ended up eating at our favorite local BBQ  restaurant.  The one we ate at for our anniversary.  

Then we went home and went to bed. 

It's what Big Mama refers to as Old Love.

We're just not big on Valentine's Day.  Some years we do gifts and some years we don't.

Andrew bought me flowers this year.  They are absolutely beautiful!

This year I decided to give him a little something everyday starting February 1.  I think his favorite gift was probably the Legos.  HA!  He's a kid at heart and I love that about him.

Random Tuesday Thoughts

{one}

Yesterday was definitely Monday.  I could feel it.  I had a bad case of the Monday blues.  It didn't help that they have been talking about lots of snow for several weeks and now there is none in the forecast for my area.  Bummer!  I guess I should be thankful since we've already had nine snow days.  I just really like sleeping in and staying in my PJs all day.  It's no fun to have to go outside when its this cold.

{two}

I had an appointment today to get my teeth cleaned.  I talked with my dentist about having those four teeth pulled so that we can start the process of getting adult braces. When it was all said and done I had an appointment scheduled to have four teeth extracted next month.  You know you have a good dentist when he convinces you that have four teeth extracted isn't that big of a deal and won't be that bad.

{three}

An appointment that I'm a little more excited is my hair appointment scheduled for Friday morning.  I've been torn between three different looks, but I think I finally know which one I'm going to go with.

{four}

I got a sneak peak at my new blog design and I can't wait to share it with you.  I love it!!  Miranda is so talented and such a sweet friend.  I felt like I didn't give her much to work with for this design but she is coming up with exactly what I had in mind.  Check her work out here.  You will not be disappointed you chose her to give your blog a makeover.

{five}

I just finished reading The Antelope in the Living Room by Melanie Shankle also known as Big Mama.  I have to confess I had never read her blog before.  I'm not sure what led me to read her books especially since I read Sparkly Green Earrings first and I don't even have children.  But I am so glad I read them.  They were hilarious!  I'm a fan.  If you haven't read them, you need to.  I was laughing out loud.  Andrew would just look over like I was crazy.  It was that funny!

Snow Day #9

I'm home enjoying yet another snow day.  Today makes #9 for my school district.

Goodbye Summer Vacation!  It was nice knowing you!

Seriously...I don't remember ever missing this many days in one year.  

But I'm trying to choose a positive attitude and enjoy the time at home and not think about having to make up all of these missed days.

Our little town is beautiful right now.  

Andrew has been working at home so Snow Days have allowed me a little extra time with him.  We get to sit down together and have lunch each day.  

Snow Days mean trying new recipes and laughing when they completely fail.

I tried a new recipe from Pinterest last night.  It was a MAJOR fail!  

I have yet to try to a recipe from Pinterest that wasn't a fail.

I'm going to blame Pinterest! 

It can't possibly be me or the fact that I don't like cooking and am not very good at it.

I posted this picture last night of the aftermath of our dinner.

The caption included some of the quotes that came out of my sweet husband's mouth over the course of attempting to eat this chicken crescent roll thing.

"Would you be interested in taking cooking lessons?"

"Now we're figuring out how to eat this."

"Time for dessert.  What do you want?  A turkey sandwich?"

 One thing is for sure...He makes me laugh.

Snow Days also mean lots of time to watch my new favorite TV show.

I've also had lots of time to search Pinterest for a new haircut.  It is time for a change.  My hair is pretty thin and does better with a shorter cut.  

I sort of like this cut, but it is WAY out of my comfort zone.  I've been texting it to my friends to get their opinion.  So far the look has gotten mixed reviews.

Andrew isn't a fan at all.  I'm not sure I'm brave enough to go this short.   

I just know I'm ready for something different.

Unfortunately, snow days also mean time to work on taxes.  YUCK! 

But it has to be done.

Have to focus on the positive...like my beautiful view of Sugarloaf Mountain.

God's creation.  It's amazing!

A Potential Snow Day

I have a feeling there is another snow day in my future.  It is currently sleeting outside and there is supposed to be snow on the way.

I have mixed feelings about it.  I wouldn't mind a day or two off but I also don't want another week of snow days to make up.  

We had a very productive day yesterday and now we are ready for a relaxing snow day.

The LBs finally got a much needed bath.  Bath time isn't exactly their favorite thing to do.

As you can see Liberty clutches on for dear life when it is time for a bath.  Lincoln may look all sweet and innocent in this picture, but he is wild.  Bathing him is definitely a workout.  He only jumped out of the bathtub three times.  That doesn't include all the times he TRIED to jump out of the tub.  By the time we were finished the bathroom was covered in water.  

Also...don't you just love Liberty's "toupee"?  Andrew said she was the Donald Trump of dogs.  HA!

We are all caught up on laundry and we joined everyone else in our town at Wal-Mart to get our milk and bread.

Now we are curled up watching football coverage.

Why oh why does the Super Bowl mean we have to watch football ALL DAY?

Can we not just watch the game?

I'm keeping myself entertained with some online shopping.  I'm constantly drinking water at work.  It's my thing.  I'm the teacher that drinks water.  I prefer to drink from a cup with a straw, but the straw to my owl tumbler broke back in August.  I finally ordered myself a new cup today from this Etsy shop.

I can't wait to get it.  I'm pretty much obsessed with monograms.  I want to put my monogram on everything.



This is a horrible way to end a blog post, but that pretty much wraps up my random thoughts for the day.

I'll try for a better ending on my next post.

Our Visit with the Trumpeter Swans

Last Saturday Andrew & I went to Magness Lake to see the Trumpeter Swans.  

Our small little town is their winter getaway spot.

It all started with 3 Trumpeter Swans back in 1991.

They are pretty big birds.  They are the largest waterfowl species native to North America.  

There around 150 swans on the lake, including some adorable babies which are apparently called cygnets.

They make a very interesting sound.  It's the reason they are called trumpeter swans.  It was too funny.  They are definitely some mouthy birds.

They are just one more awesome thing about our little town.

We will definitely be visiting them again.