Monday, June 3, 2013

Home


This saying has never been more true to me until five months ago.  Even though I was in the house we owned and Andrew was in a tiny rent house, that tiny rent house felt more like home to me that our house.  The feeling only grew when my furbabies moved in with Andrew and I moved to an apartment.

After five months of living in separate houses in separate towns, I finally moved back in with my husband a little over a week ago.  It was a bittersweet moment.

Up until my last day at HG actually arrived, I was more than ready to get out of there.  I knew I would miss my coworkers, but I was R-E-A-D-Y to live with my husband again.  In fact, I felt a little guilty for wanting to be out of there so badly.

Then my last day came.  Quicker than I really wanted.  I woke up feeling sick that morning.  Everything I did, I couldn't help but think how it was the last time... the last time I would pull into the school parking lot, the last time I would lock up my classroom, the last time..

I pretty much started crying as soon as I woke up.  In fact for most of the day there was a song playing in my head - How Can I Help You to Say Goodbye by Patty Loveless.

It's okay to hurt and it's okay to cry.  How can I help you to say goodbye?

Ha!  It's a little comical I know.

At one point I laid my phone down to go to the bathroom only to come back and discover this picture...


That would be my principal and my best friend.  Ya'll I have a very special relationship with my principal.  Though she was very much my boss, she is also a friend.

And as for Traci?  It's been a long time since I had a real best friend.  A friend that I can to with anything.  A friend to go get mani/pedis with.  A friend who allows me to crash at her house for the last week of school when I had to be out of the apartment.

Saying goodbye to her was hard.  We've been in denial ever since Andrew accepted the job.

So how did it go?  We acted like two mature adults.  We hugged and then jumped in our cars to keep from crying.

Of course as soon as I put the car in reverse, the ugly cry began.  I know that our friendship has not ended just because I moved.  I know that I will make new friends at my new school.  But man am I going to miss teaching next to her every day.

Speaking of my new school.  I started work today.  I spent the day touring the school and planning units.  It was very overwhelming to say the least.  I came home and curled up in bed with my chocolate.  It was that kind of day.

Everyone was so incredibly nice and helpful.  It wasn't a bad day.  It was just different.

It is all different and taking some getting used to.

Being here - knowing this home and I don't have to go back  - it's a great feeling, but it's also an odd feeling.

Like it has sunken in yet that I am home.

Home sweet home.

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